Black Tumblr Themes

saucefactory:


queelez:


lord-of-the-nerds:


discordion:


When he was 2 years old, he fell out of a second story window and fractured his skull
When he was 6 years old, he mistakenly drank boric acid.
When he was 9 years old, he fell over a small cliff and broke his leg.
When he was 11 years old, he contracted measles and was in a coma for nine days.
When he was 14 years old, he broke his arm when he caught it in a carriage door.
When he was 19 years old, he was struck on the head by a falling brick.
When he was 23 years old, he almost died from the effects of tainted wine.
When he was 29 years old, Adolph Sax invented the saxophone.


clearly someone didn’t want that saxophone invented 


#incompetent time-travelling saxophone haters


THIS NEEDS TO BE A 300-PAGE SCI-FI NOVEL BECAUSE I WOULD READ THE HELL OUTTA THAT



johndoomedbutlovingitegbert:

pikanan:

florawrsaurus:

adamspong:

florawrsaurus:

science side of tumblr? explain?

levitate egg sackiatoo

yeah okay thanks hp fandom

the burning candle uses up all the oxygen in the bottle, which creates and a vacuum, and the resulting suction makes the egg go nyooom.

Thank you science side



electricshoebox:

pomfcat:

Such polite barks

he gets up all excited the last time like YEAH I’M GONNA SPEAK YEAH WATCH THIS

"…….wuf"

(via pizza)


spoken-not-written:

THE CUTEST THING IS WHEN SOMEONE CAN’T STOP SMILING LIKE THEY SMILE THEN THEY TRY TO NOT SMILE THEN THEY END UP SMILING MORE AND THEIR CHEEKS GO ALL CUTE AND SAPOIDSP[DOSADPSA[]PS[]DSAPD[]SAP

(via ian-hecox)


thirstiest:

nentindo:

hokeyfright:

can the science side of tumblr explain this

image

swag • per • a • tion /swaəgpərashion/

adj. To channel the swagger inside of you and turn it into pure teleportation energy.

i.e. “dude, this party blows, i’m swagperating out of here”

this person wrote a noun, listed it as an adjective, and defined and used it as a verb

(via ian-hecox)


professorfalconer:

thesylverlining:

elkian:

teen-heat:

why do advertisers sexualize female m&ms

why do advertisers assign gender to m&ms

why do advertisers humanize food products

why is there a bear family who considers the highlight of their day to be wiping their asses

why can no one believe it’s not butter

(via sorry)



poppypicklesticks:

darthvoldemort:

Let it burn

The smell of roasting human flesh never bothered me anyway

(via willsmithsafro)


HIGH SCHOOL



This is how to run a stick of Chapstick
down the black boxes on your scantron
so the grading machine skips the wrong
answers. This is how to honor roll. Hell,
this is how to National Honor Society.
This is being voted “Most Likely to Marry
for Money” or “Talks the Most, Says the
Least” for senior superlatives. This is
stepping around the kids having panic
attacks in the hallway. This is being the
kid having a panic attack in the hallway.
This is making the A with purple moons
stamped under both eyes. We had to try.
This is telling the ACT supervisor you have
ADHD to get extra time. Today, the average
high school student has the same anxiety
levels as the average 1950’s psychiatric
patient. We know the Pythagorean theorem
by heart, but short-circuit when asked
“How are you?” We don’t know. We don’t
know. That wasn’t on the study guide.
We usually know the answer, but rarely
know ourselves.


HIGH SCHOOL By Blythe Baird (via blythebrooklyn)

(via louderlove)



oknope:

you never realize how boring your life is until someone asks what you like to do for fun.

(via taylorgaspard)







benpaddon:

The phrase “words to live by” gets thrown around often these days, but these are absolutely words to live by.

(via oddisity)



lollittaaa:


I long for your lips on mine,Our hands to intertwine.I long for our bodies pressed together,You and me baby, forever.



thelonelyscarecrow:

castiels-time-traveler:

nintendocanada:

mapsontheweb:

Map of the World by Natural Skin Color

i’m really dumbfounded that i never realized skin colour is literally just caused by being closer to or farther from the equator and the resulting sun exposure and skin darkening

actually, its an adaptation. natural selection. people with darker skin are selected for in areas near the equator, where the melanin that causes the darker color protects them from radiation and protects them from skin cancer and other health defects, and because they are healthier they can pass on that trait more. people near the poles have lighter skin because it allows them absorb more of the limited sunlight to convert to vitamin d. 

THIS IS THE THING SOME PEOPLE HATE OTHER PEOPLE OVER.Evolution of melanin levels based on geographical location.


andrewsadrian:

i just saw an ad that was probably supposed to say accident lawyers but it said accidental lawyers and i can’t sotp laughing “just got my law degree aw man this wasn’t what i meant to do how am i gonna get out of this one”

(via moistbottom)


doglets:

“Pew pew pew” -church interior designer

(via sorry)





Slidell. NHS. Freshman. Play a little basketball. Love the beach.

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